Empty, angry, used, embarrassed, tired, shameful, depressed. Of course, she's gonna say she's happy for you and fake a smile, but look deep into those eyes, you broke her. And once you die, no one can hurt you. Wonderful isn't it? I'm getting sick and tired of being me. It hurts looking in the mirror and not liking what I see. This self-loathing is exhausting. And I hate that mood when I don't feel like talking to anyone, faking a smile, pretending to be happy like I always do, but at the same time, I don't know what's wrong. I honestly believed in you. And it's pathetic how weak I have become. My life is a silent hurricane. I feel like giving up. No one understands, and they never will. I don't see the point in living anymore. I want to drown. And I hope it fucking haunts you forever that you're the reason behind the scars on someone else's body. "Why do you keep doing this?" "Because I've stopped caring." And the fact is, I trust complete strangers on Tumblr or anywhere more than you hypocritical fuckers. Waking up is painful. And this emptiness has turned me into a monster. Don't you wish you could go back to when everything was simple? Because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself. Does it count as still being alive when everything inside me is numb? I don't think some people realise how much pain someone has to be in to put a razor to their wrist. It sucks, you know. When everything is doing fine then, it all crashes again. And the worse part is, I really don't want to try and put it all back together again, but I have to. I'm just kinda tired, you know? I want to stop trying and not care for a few days. I'm a little tired of feeling like a failure. Do you find your joke funny? I no longer give a fuck. Well, I do, but, fuck it. So I've officially given up on everything. Because I'm done caring about people who don't care about me, I spend way too much time making sure everyone else is happy so I drive myself insane because I never have time to make sure I'm still happy, and I'm done with feeling alone and unwanted every single. That's why.

We Live In A Judgemental World.

WE LIVE IN A JUDGEMENTAL WORLD.

Fuck everything. Fuck rumors. Fuck lies. Fuck people saying shit they don't know. Fuck traitors. Fuck people not minding their own business. Fuck the judgement. Fuck the stereotypes. Fuck society. Fuck stress. Fuck pleasing everyone. Fuck rules. Fuck the pressure. Fuck complications. I've had enough. Really. Being judged for everything you do and say. Then what the hell would you want me to do? Seal my lips and tie my hands so I won't be able to talk or do things? Life is pain. I wake up every morning, I'm in pain. You know how many times I wanted to just give up? How many times I thought about ending it? No, you don't, simple. I am the type of person that will sit in the bathroom and cry, but then walk out like nothing ever happened. Pathetic shit right? You don't even know how I'm living my life, so just shut the fuck up. You only judge someone when you're perfect. But are you even perfect? Nah, you're not. Everyone have their flaws. I don't think you get it. I never once called myself pretty. I don't think you get it. I am not "beautiful". You don't see what I do when I look in the mirror. You don't hear the voices in my head telling me I'm fat. No, you don't. And you will never. There's like so many other people better than me. So don't judge me. You wouldn't like it if I judge you right? Put yourself in my shoes. I'm losing my fucking mind.